I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
