Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Randomize
