Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
