My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
