Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
