There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
