David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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