The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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