Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
