Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize