I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Randomize
