I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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