Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
