so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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