so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
