You're completely useless in the revolution.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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