I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
