dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
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