all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
