then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
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