her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
