Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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