I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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