I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
