so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I had to cum in my sink.
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