so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
