Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
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