it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
