So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Randomize
