I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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