Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize