its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
