I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize