dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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