I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
