Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
