But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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