david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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