i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
