is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
