Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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