So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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