No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i think i have herpe
just one?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
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