I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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