THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
