He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
