im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
