is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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