ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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