im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize