I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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