It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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